The News That Should Have Been...

Tinky Winky has proven that news is dangerous by using this powerful statement: "In Soviet Teletubbieland, newspaper recycles you!"
Tuesday, January 24, 2006

AL-ZAWAHIRI TO WORK FOR DISNEY CHANNEL

WORLD

- reported by Osiris.

As reported 3 days ago, Al-Qaeda's number 2 al-Zawahiri was believed to have been offered a contract by the Disney Channel to read children's poems.

Yesterday Rotters International was fortunate to have been given the opportunity to meet up with the Egyptian doctor and confirm the rumours.

At a Spinelli coffehouse in Kabul, Afghanistan, al-Zawahiri was excited to tell us about his new job.

"It's wonderful to read poems, especially to children! I used to read bedtime poems and rhymes to my son. But now that he's all grown up, I recite them to al-Syafiq's son. He loves them very much!"

He added, "It's pays more than staying in that stupid cave making lame and fake death threat videos."

He would not reveal the exact details of his contract, but mentioned that it was a 6-figure yearly pay for 3 years.

A spokesman for the Disney Channel said they were now actively involved in filming the new children's show and the earliest release date would be October 16th 2006.

Said Wang Zhikai, 15, from Singapore, who is a huge fan of the Disney Channel, "It's really cool to see al-Zawahiri reading my favourite poems like 'Itsy-Bitsy Spider' and 'Humpty-Dumpty'. I can't wait to catch it on the Disney Channel when it comes out. She-go rocks!"

Rotters International regrets to inform our readers that we have been receiving a number of letters and phone calls from the CIA following our interview with al-Zawahiri. Rotters Int. would like to take this opportunity to debunk any rumours that we are working with Al-Qaeda. We are just trying to get the news first and first-hand. Rotters Int. would also like to admit that Spinelli's coffee sucks and Starbucks would have made a better choice, but the latter did not set-up an outlet in Kabul.

posted at 3:34 PM by Rotters Int. | Permalink |




0 Comments:

About Us



We are a company dedicated to bringing you the most unusual happenings around our planet.


The Rotters:

+ Osiris
+ Da Vinci
+ A very chee-bye Singapore correspondent



WE ARE NOT:

+ A sister company of Reuters International, though we are always open to takeover talks.

+ A newswire. For the real latest news, please click on the links below this nav bar.

+ Stupid. If we were dumb, we would not know enough html coding to edit this website and publish your favourite articles.

We greatly appreciate feedback on our articles. Please comment on our article - the option is just after the end of each post. And we also invite readers to contribute articles as well. Send your writings, questions and feedback on how we can improve to this email address: rottersint@gmail.com



Monthly News Archives

January 2006
February 2006
March 2006
May 2006
June 2006
August 2006
September 2006
October 2006
November 2006
December 2006
Return to the Main Page



Recent Articles

MAN SUES BURGER KING
BIN LADEN'S NO. 2 RELEASES POEM
ELVIS LIVES!
PLUTO MISSION TAKES OFF
BEST CHICKEN RICE FOUND
BRAD PITT SEEN WITH JENNIFER ANISTON
NOKIA CUTS JOBS, SACKS CHIEF DEISGNER
EPL BIG CLUBS COMING TO S'PORE
KIM JONG IL : CHINA IS A NICE COUNTRY
US TO IRAN : REMOVE NUCLEAR TECHNOLOGY OR BE FUCKED



News Categories

There is a coding error. If you receive a Error 404 message, remove the "%22" characters from the link bar and try again. It should work. If you still encounter difficulties you can email us.

Iceland
World
Home
Sports
Entertainment
Business
Technology
Gaming



Real News Websites

CNN
Reuters
BBC
Google News



Points to Note

To all our readers who already know the identities behind the contributors, please do not reveal them to others as we do not wish our offices to be raided by the "12 Monkeys Dept." of the CIA again. Thank you for your kind understanding.

The team behind Rotters Int. takes a very strong stand on plagiarism, and be assured that all our articles are original and of the highest quality. If you do find similarities between our articles and those on other websites, most probably it is a case of pure coincidence, although it could also be a case of the other party plagiarising from our website. If you believe that our articles are being plagiarised, please email us a notification immediately so that we can take appropriate legal ( and sometimes illegal ) action against these shameless people.


Copyright Rotters International 2006. All Rights Reserved.
Get awesome blog templates like this one from BlogSkins.com